Tuesday, September 29, 2009


After a very long week of resting, my foot is finally better. YA-HOO!

My human thinks I must have just twisted it the wrong way trying to keep up with the big dogs during a crazy game of chase.
Because my injury wasn't serious, I didn't have to go to the vet. But when I visited ARF a few weeks ago, I did get to play sick in their make-believe animal hospital.

(Playing sick is SO much better than BEING sick, by the way. You get to lie on a table and people fuss all over you, but nobody sticks anything up your butt!

Anyway. Lynn, the nice lady who gave us the ARF tour, said ARF's hospital-of-make-believe teaches kids that pets need more than just love (even though we need lots of that too). My human says when you bring an animal into your life, you become responsible for everything he needs. Including expensive trips to the vet.

My human knows all about expensive trips to the vet, so she got me and brother Dutch our own health insurance. She says it can really help keep vet bills manageable. I don't know all that much about it, but I do know it came in reeeallly handy that time I faked a heart attack to save my boy parts.

There's a whole bunch of pet health insurance companies out there and some are better than others. My human said reading real reviews from other humans helped her narrow things down. If you've been wondering whether or not to insure your animal friends, here's a sign you should make a decision today:
Google just told me September is National Pet Health Insurance Month... and tomorrow it turns October.


My human says my foot is still healing and I have to "take it easy" for a couple more days. She doesn't seem to understand how boring 'easy' is, but she does try to keep me entertained.

At least that's what she says she's doing. Sometimes I wonder.

Yesterday she brought home this... uh... thing for me to wear. She said it's a costume for my first Halloween. Said it's supposed to make me look like a banana. I don't know anything about Halloween, but I've seen a banana before and don't think I look like one -- with or without the costume.

My human agreed and said the banana suit made me look like a garden gnome. Brother Dutch just laughed and said I looked like a yellow Smurf. Whatever that is.
Anyway, my human said she'll find me a costume that fits better and doesn't make me look like a Smurf when it's supposed to make me look like a piece of fruit.

In case you need to get your own Halloween suit, my human got the banana at a place called Target. She says they have some really cute costumes [note from human: unless you have a giant pug, don't buy the banana in size L -- even if it does say fits dogs 21lbs and up].

Monday, September 28, 2009


Another thanks to everyone who's been voting for me. The Week 3 winner gets announced today and wouldn't it be cool if I won... again!?!

My human didn't want to do another picture for Week 4. She said it's hard to resist a cute, soda drinking pug and we ought to give non-pugs a chance to win too. But I begged her to do just one more and promised not to look - as she calls it -
ridiculously cute.

I got kinda full after weeks of drinking soda, so this is just me and my empty Hansen's can hanging out on my favorite bench. I'm usually not a fan of benches (who wants to sit when you can run around and play??) but sometimes my human like to sit here and I am a huge fan of sitting on laps.

No need to vote for this one (unless you've reeeally, really enjoyed voting and want to help raise more money for the school gardens program). I need everyone to save up their strength for next week's Grand Prize vote-off. I'll let you know more about that later in the week.

Here's a link, if you want to keep voting:


Friday, September 25, 2009


I really did not enjoy the last time I hurt my foot. Brother Dutch got to do all the normal fun stuff, but I had to stay home and "recover". I got really antsy and my human said I [quote] drove her nuts after about the first 6 hours of my 7-10 day rest period.

o this time she found a way for me to burn off energy - without using my bad foot. At first I was skeptical. I mean, how much energy can you really burn without using your feet? She told me we'd be going to a cool place called The Rex Center, and promised it'd be both fun and "therapeutic". I didn't really care about the therapy part, but after a whole day of elevating, anything fun sounded good.

On the way to The Rex Center, my human filled me in on exactly what I'd be doing there: swimming! Turns out The Rex Center is an 'aquatic fitness center' for dogs. My human says The Rex is the perfect place for older, overweight and 'recovering' dogs like me to exercise safely.

We all know how much I like to swim, but when it came time to get in the pool I was kinda nervous. This is totally embarrassing, but I usually don't go anywhere without Brother Dutch and it was a little scary to to try something new all by myself. Cathy - owner of The Rex and an expert K9 swim coach - picked up on my fear right away and got into the pool so I wouldn't be alone.

With Cathy's help, it took about two seconds for me to forget all about being without Dutch and being scared. Cathy stayed in the pool with me, in case I remembered to be afraid, but there wasn't anything scary about the pool. It was nice and warm and 100% tsunami-free.

Cathy and I
got to talking and she told me five minutes of swimming is like going for a five mile run. By the time I got out of the pool, I was nice and tired. My human totally was right - I burned off all my antsy energy, had lots of fun, and my bad foot never touched the ground!


The Rex Center
Pacifica, CA

Thursday, September 24, 2009


So I was at the park yesterday, just doing my thing, and -- I don't know what happened. One minute I was kicking butt in a game of chase, and next thing you know one of my feet stopped working. It hurt so bad I didn't want to walk on it.

I couldn't walk good enough to get myself home from the park, so my human had to carry me. Talk about embarrassing! But as soon as we got home, she did some stuff to make my foot better. I've been down this road once before and knew the routine: baby aspirin, frozen peas, homeopathic jelly, then to bed.

If my foot doesn't feel better soon, I'll have to go the vet. But that's not the worst of it -- the
last time my foot hurt I had to stay in bed for a whole WEEK. Ugh. So I asked my human if there's anything we can do to speed things up this time. She said if I can elevate my foot - y'know, keep it in the air about my heart - that will keep the swelling down and, somehow, help it get better.

It didn't take very long to find a comfortable position to elevate from. Now I just need to figure out a way to watch Animal Planet upside down.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009


So I've been having this ongoing debate with my human about my diet. It goes something like:

me: can you please buy me some Popeye's fried chicken?
Human: no.
me: but my friend Stubby gets to eat it all the time. And bacon too.
Human: maybe you should go live with Stubby then.
me: but it gets cold where he lives.
Human: maybe that's why Stubby gets to eat fried chicken and bacon.

I've been campaigning for fried, meaty snacks for WEEKS now. But all we ever get is carrots, asparagus, apples and the occasional snout, hoof or freeze-dried bull penis. My human says it's because brother Dutch is a dalmatian and dalmatians can get kidney stones if they eat too much meaty stuff. Or something like that.

Well, my human must have been in a good mood from winning the Hansen's contest because when she was leaving to go to dinner last night I asked if she'd bring me back something from the restaurant. Sure, she said. Really??


I couldn't believe it. All my other friends get 'doggy bags' when their humans go out to restaurants, but my human never brings anything home for us. Ever. The whole time she was gone, I tried to imagine what she'd be bringing home for us to eat. Popeyes? Bacon? Some other kind of meat I've never heard of, let alone eaten?

But no. She brought me this. It smelled a little like that crab I ate at the beach, only less flavorful, with a very strong aroma of... kelp (something I also ate at the beach once).

me: what is it?
Human: sushi! It's YUMMY!
me: is it meaty?
Human: I think there's some crab in it. See - right next to the avocado, carrots and cucumber.
me: oh. why does it smell like kelp then?
Human: good nose, Puglet! There's seaweed in there too. Seaweed is a lot like like kelp. It's what holds the sushi roll together.

Not to sound ungrateful or anything, but I can't believe I've waited my whole entire life for a doggy bag... and my human brings home stuff I eat at the beach all the time.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009


Who's the best soda-sipping pug in the world? ME!

Thanks again for making me a winner. I've never won anything before and it's kinda cool. Now I just want to keep on winning. So
if you want to keep voting, I'd love to keep winning. Hint. Hint.


Don't worry though, I won't spend an entire week talking about it like I did with the balloon festival. I'm working on being a little less... obsessive.

Speaking of balloons... you're probably wondering why I'm sitting on a mule. And now you're also probably wondering what sitting on a mule has to do with balloons. Ok, so my spotted friend Miley was the one who first told me about hot air balloons. And since I didn't get a chance to fly at the balloon festival, Miley asked if I wanted to ride a mule instead.

Of course I had no idea what a mule was when I said yes. We don't have mules where I live. And I feel kinda dumb saying this now that I know what a mule is, but I kinda assumed riding a mule would be like flying.

Uhm. Yeah. I'm pretty sure riding a mule isn't anything like flying, but it was still fun. Sandy The Mule was super nice to me and apologized profusely for not being able to leave the ground.

Monday, September 21, 2009


Thanks everyone for taking time to vote for me. We'll find out today if I'm the lucky winner. My human entered this picture of me for the next round, just in case. So if you liked voting, you can keep on doing it for my new picture:


Anyway. A few people asked my human how she gets me to do this kinda stuff. Well, the short answer is Cheerios. But getting your human to give you Cheerios can be tricky.

Here's what I know:

There's a method to the Cheerios. The secret is to pay very close attention to what happened right before the Cheerios came. Listen for clues. High pitched, happy sounds means you're doing something right. Keep doing it and the Cheerios will come. If you hear silence or grumpy sounds, stop what you're doing and try something else. Grumpy sounds mean no Cheerios.

If a human says the same word over and over again, it means they want to give you Cheerios. Your job is keep track of what you're supposed to do when you hear a particular word. Humans have A LOT of words, so it can be kinda hard to remember what they all mean. It helps if you only pay attention to the ones that really matter. Y'know, the ones that mean Cheerios.

You might also want to keep your ears open for words you recognize.
If you hear the word 'sit', go ahead and sit. Try to look as cute as possible while doing it. Even if your human wasn't talking to you, there's a good chance they'll give you Cheerios just for paying attention. And looking cute while doing it.

Friday, September 18, 2009


Now that balloon fever is out of my system, I can get on with more pressing things. Y'know, like eating, and napping, and... talking about one of my other #1 favorite topics: recycled canines.

Yesterday my human took me to visit this place called ARF (Animal Rescue Foundation). I'd been to their website before (it's the one with all that really good disaster preparedness info) and was excited to get to visit them for real. A really nice lady named Lynn showed us around and introduced me to some dogs and cats. I'd never met a cat before and didn't know they need humans too.

During our tour, Lynn gave us the lowdown on ARF's mission. I learned they do a LOT more than help homeless pets find a human. For one, they have a special boy/girl parts-removal department. Y'know, to help keep the number of homeless animals under control. And they also have about a million special programs for animals and their people. But the coolest, most specialest thing about ARF is the way they bring people and animals together in so many different ways.

I'm not going to tell you about that right now though. Because even though it's all really good stuff, some of it made my human's eyes leak and I don't want to risk making anyone leak right before the weekend. I'll wait until a Monday or a Tuesday for that.

Thursday, September 17, 2009


See that balloon? Well, I wasn't in it. I didn't get to fly at the balloon festival, but that's OK. My human says sometimes dreams don't come true right away. Sometimes, you have to take a lot of puppy steps to get there.

Even though I didn't get to fly, I'm really glad I got to see all the balloons, meet The Bees, and talk to people like Pilot Todd. I learned a whole bunch of stuff about flying so when my time to fly finally comes, I'll be super-ready for it.

The festival people are having a photo contest and my human is entering one of her balloon pictures. And you know what first prize is?
Getting to fly in a balloon at next year's festival. I haven't given up the dream...

Wednesday, September 16, 2009


So I was really happy when the balloons started to grow. Y'know, after waking up at 4:30 - in the morning - to see them all. Pretty soon, they were sprouting up everywhere.

I learned it takes *awhile* to blow up a great big giant balloon, so instead of standing around waiting for them to be full, we went looking for The Bees. We lots of nice people along the way (and only one or two meanies who grumped at my human for bringing us). For the record, the festival website said 'dogs get spooked by all the people and unpredictable sounds that balloons make, so please leave your pets at home!' -- but technically, no one said ever dogs couldn't go to the festival. I mean, we weren't afraid of the balloons. Even brother Dutch liked them.


It didn't take long to find The Bees; lots and LOTS of other people wanted to see them too. While The Bees were busy inflating, I met the pilot of Joey Bee (the blue one). His name was Todd and, being a pilot and all, he knew all sorts of stuff about flying. I told him all about my flying dream, about Operation Kitty Hawk. He told me all about flying, and about his Mini Pinscher dog.

My human asked Todd if I could get in his Bee's basket, so I could get a feel for what it's like to be a real flying pilot. Todd was really nice and said he'd see what he could do. When I heard that, I almost peed with joy. A real balloon's basket? With a real flying pilot? Yeah!

The only problem with the basket was that I was too short to see out of it. Pilot Todd apologized and explained that balloon baskets aren't really made to for Pugs. I didn't mind though. I still got to see the inside and Pilot Todd showed me how everything works.

I now know why my earlier flying attempt didn't work. I now know you need the following things to fly: a great big balloon, a basket, and some rope... a giant fan, tanks of gas, a little bit of fire, and someone like Pilot Todd, who knows what they're doing.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009


Once we got past all the traffic, we stopped to play in the mountains. Brother Dutch got all freaked out because he thought we'd have to sleep in a tent and my human promised him there'd be no tents this trip. I wanted to sleep with the wilderness and campaigned for the tent, big time. But my human said balloons wake up early, so we had to stay in a hotel close to the festival.

We still had to get up at like 4:30 - in the morning - to get to the balloons on time. It was pitch black and I thought my human totally had it wrong, but when we got to the festival place there was a great big traffic jam of people. I've never seen so many people in one place before. I'm talking a whole bunch of thousands, all going to see the balloons.

Now, the original plan was to leave Dutch in the car because he can be a wimp and my human thought the balloons would scare him. But we had to park really really far away and my human said scary balloons would be better than "leaving him all alone in Guam". So we all wandered through the dark together (with about a million other people), looking for balloons.

It was still dark, but a few balloons were already floating around the sky. By the time we finally made it to the launch-spot though, there weren't any balloons. None. ZERO. The sun wasn't even up - I didn't understand how we could've missed alll the balloons.

I was all set to panic... until a great big giant balloon started growing out of the ground right next to us.
This was the first of many things I learned about balloons: before they can fly, they need to be inflated.

Monday, September 14, 2009


I just had THE BEST weekend on earth. The Reno balloon festival was on Saturday and we spent the rest of the weekend playing in The Mountains. But before I get to the good stuff, I have a question for everyone.

What's the deal with traffic? I mean, were does this stuff come from??

I'm only asking because it's only supposed to take few hours to get to The Mountains, but we were stuck in the car for almost FIVE. That's like twice as long as it should. From what I can tell, there's nothing good about traffic. Humans don't seem to like it and it's definitely not fun for dogs. Unless you count being able to ride in the backseat instead of the "dog pod" as fun - but that only happens if the traffic happens when it's hot outside.

I asked my human about the traffic, but all she said was 'traffic just happens'. She said sometimes there's an accident, sometimes there's construction, but I didn't see either on the way to The Mountains. So I asked my friend Google (who knows a lot more than my human) and Google says "traffic happens" for a few reasons:

Bottlenecks ............. 50% of total congestion
Traffic incidents ....... 25% of total congestion
Work zones ............. 15% of total congestion
Bad weather ............ 10% of total congestion
Poor signal timing ...... 5% of total congestion

BUT, Google says there might be another explanation: you. Well, not YOU, you -- but you humans in general. They call it 'human error', and it means if just one driver suddenly slows down, it can mess everything up for everyone.

So please drive good and safe and don't make any human errors. I'll be back tomorrow with the good stuff.

Friday, September 11, 2009


Hi everyone, I have a huge favor to ask. My human entered this picture of me in a contest and in order to get to the finals, I need votes.

It only takes a few clicks to vote and I'll love you forever if you click. Ok, I love everyone and will still love you even if you don't click. But please click anyway. And tell your friends to click for me too!

Oh yeah - and every time you vote (even if it's not for me) Hansen's Natural Soda will donate 10 cents to the San Francisco Schools Gardening Program.

to cast your vote for me.

And just between us, here's one of the pictures that didn't make it in the contest:

Thursday, September 10, 2009


Ok, I don't usually dwell on stuff, but I feel like I should explain the whole birthday crab thing. I know it'll be hard to believe, but I swear it was an accidental death.

No, really. It kinda was. Y'see we went to the beach last weekend and brother Dutch dug up this great big dead crab (he's really good at finding dead stuff). He said it was "too smelly" for him to eat and gave it to me because I'll eat anything (see exhibit A) . I'd never eaten - or ever seen - a crab before and wasn't sure what to do with it. So I just ate whatever came first.

And it was kinda gross. And really really crunchy. Dutch just laughed and told me I was eating the crab's shell, which is really just a crab-container and not the part you're supposed to eat. To get to the good stuff, he said, I had to break the shell open to find the insides.

And that's all I was trying to do with the birthday crab! I thought if I ripped it open, I could get to the yummy insides. I wasn't trying to destroy it. That just kinda happened when I was looking for a way in.Then once I got it open, it wasn't anything like the crab at the beach. So I just kept pulling it apart, looking for the yummy stuff (which, for the record, I never did find).

I'm not the heartless birthday-crab toy killer Dutch made me out to be. I just wanted to eat some crab! It was just, like, a bad case of hunger or mistaken identity or something.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009


I haven't gotten up on my soapbox in awhile so I figure nobody will mind if I rant a little bit about one of my favorite causes: recycled canines.

My human says we get lots of emails & comments from people who've adopted pugs or who foster homeless pugs, so I know y'all won't mind me taking a few minutes to spread the word about a dog in serious need of a new life. Even though she's not a pug. And I know no one will mind me saying that second-hand dogs can be perfectly perfect. Both me and brother dutch were "recycled" and my human says we're the best dogs ever.


So, I heard about this dog named Lacey who could really use a new human. She's a girl dalmatian with lots of black spots (I don't have a good picture of her, so I've done my best re-enactment). Lacey is four years old, has had her girl parts removed, and is up to date on all her shots. She's sweet, good with people, older children and other dogs (she's a little much for young children and small dogs).

All that sounds pretty good, right? Well, here's the not-so-good part: Lacey's human doesn't have much time to spend with her, so Lacey spends most of her time stuck in The Box. I remember The Box from my puppy days and I also remember being really really happy when my human stopped putting me in it. And I only had to sleep in there at night. I can't imagine spending most of my time in The Box.


Like a lot of recycled dogs, Lacey will need a new human who's willing to help her adjust to life outside The Box. If you read this and know of anyone who's looking to adopt a dog like Lacey, you can contact Nor Cal Dal Rescue for more info. If you don't know of anyone, that's OK too. Just remember to spread the word about all the dogs like Lacey who deserve a second chance at life.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009


Hey everybody, Dutch here. Pug said I could take over today so I could tell you all about my birthday. And also because he destroyed one of my new birthday toys and is trying to get back on my good side.

Turning six wasn't much different than turning five, except for having to share my day with Pug. I'm pretty used to that though - I've gotten very good at sharing. So we split the birthday cookies The Man bought me. And I let him play with the new loofah dog our cousin Sophie sent. But I drew the line at sharing one of the toys my human gave me. I mean, it was MY birthday and I wanted the crab to be all mine.

Please don't think I was being selfish. I had good reason for not wanting to share: the pug is a toy destroyer. If it's stuffed,
he unstuffs it. Squeakies get de-squeaked in minutes. My new toy was stuffed and it squeaked - and I wanted it to stay that way.

I did my best to keep the birthday crab safe. This is a little embarrassing, but Pug is way more alpha than I am. A lot of people think I must be top dog because I'm so much bigger. Doesn't work that way. See that face I'm making in today's picture? That's my best (and only) defense against the pug.

And you see this mangled toy?

Yeah. That's my new brand new birthday crab after Pug got through with it. I seriously need to work on my scary-face before my next birthday.

Monday, September 7, 2009


I'm working hard on a nap to celebrate...

Thursday, September 3, 2009


I feel really bad for making so many people's eyes leak yesterday. Thank God I have nothing but 100% happiness for you today.

It's finally Brother Dutch's turn to wear the scary hat because today he turns six!
I really hope he gets some yummy birthday cookies and cool new toys to share with me because I don't get to have another birthday until next June.

This birthday stuff should really happen more than once a year.
I tried to convince my human that since 1 human year = about 7 dog years, dog-birthdays should happen 7 times a year (minus the scary hat). She didn't buy it though.



The UPS guy came to our door yesterday. And I guess I must've been in the way or something because my human picked me up... and suddenly I found myself eye to eye with a pair of giant black dogs.

I'd never seen these dogs before and didn't know what they were doing stuck to a wall in our house. I didn't want to freak out the UPS guy with a bunch of woofing, but
as soon as the door shut, I let out my best woo-woo-woo!

My human just laughed.
Silly pug! That picture has been on the wall for AGES. Really? Didn't exactly make me feel better. That's Moby and Grendel, she said. They lived with me a long time ago. What?? I never knew my human lived with other dogs. I mean, I know she fostered homeless dogs before I came along, but when I asked brother Dutch about these Moby and Grendel characters, he had no idea who they were.

So I asked my human to tell me more about the strange dogs. At first she didn't say much, but then her eyes started to leak. I licked her face until the leaking stopped and she told me Moby and Grendel were really special. Like me and Dutch - but different. She loved them a lot and was really sad when they weren't around anymore. That's why she hung their picture on the wall by the front door -- so she could see them everyday.

I was kinda scared to ask where Moby and Grendel went and if they were ever coming back. So I made Dutch do it. My human told him that Moby went to sleep because she had cancer in her bones and sleeping feels better than having cancer in your bones. And Grendel went to sleep after a giant truck ran my human's car off the highway. I guess because sleeping feels better than getting hit by a giant truck.

I guess there are times when going to sleep is the best thing you can do.
I asked my human if I'd go to sleep one day too. No way, she said, you're going to be with me forever.


September 13th is National Pet Memorial Day. A special day for remembering all the special animals we've had in our lives.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009


Whenever we're in the car, my human makes us listen to NPR (National Public Radio). She says it's "good for the brain". Sometimes it can get pretty boring, but most of the time it's cool. This week is especially cool because it's Animal Week on the interview show Fresh Air. For an hour a day for one whole week, there will be no financial crisis. No war in Iraq (or Afghanistan). No health care reform debate. Just 100% animals.


Yesterday's show was about how to be your dog's b
est friend when it comes to health care. The interview was with a really cool vet who wrote a book called Speaking for Spot to help humans learn how to speak up for their dogs. Brother Dutch actually went to the vet's special hospital once and was really impressed (Dutch has been to LOTS of vets and isn't easy to impress) so I'd trust her advice.

On today's Fresh Air they interviewed Temple Grandin, a super-genius animal behavior scientist who totally gets how animals work. She also happens to have a form of autism called Asperger's Syndome -- which could be the secret behind her special abilities. She definitely seems to be aware of things non-autistic people don't notice - but animals do. My human has a few of her books and has promised to help me write a review real soon.

Oh - and speaking of reviews... in a second interview that aired today, they talked to the guy who wrote that book I just reviewed, One Nation Under Dog. If you don't have time to read a whole book, you should at least listen to the interview. Good stuff!

I don't know what all the rest of the week's sho
ws will be, but tomorrow's will be about something called "veterinary forensics"; animals rescued during hurricane Katrina; and the Puppies Behind Bars program.

You can listen to all of them online here for

Here are direct links to the shows I mentioned:

Speaking for Spot
prescription for being your dog's best advocate
Temple Grandin - author of Animals Make Us Human

One Nation Under Dog - interview with author Michael Schaffer