Friday, May 31, 2013

IT'S ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL SOMETHING FLIES UP YOUR SNOUT



I'm pretty sure my human wasn't lying when she said the flies wouldn't hurt me. She probably just didn't know one of them was going to get stuck in my snout. Because if she *did* know something was going to get stuck in my snout, she probably wouldn't have let it happen in the middle of a field a few miles from the car.

But that's exactly what happened. And it hurt.
If you've never had anything stuck in your snout, there's not a whole lot you can do about it. I tried coughing it up. Didn't work. I rolled around on the ground. Didn't work either. That's when the sneezing started. I'm not talking a few sneezes either. I mean crazy sneezing. Y'know, the kind that freaks out your human.

My human was extra freaked out about the sneezing because she thought I inhaled one of those evil foxtail things. I guess she saw one stuck to my face and thought it went up my snout. From the video footage:


I don't know if it was a fly or a fox or what, but whatever was up my snout wanted OUT. I was sneezing so bad I couldn't walk. We were miles from Mazda and I HATE being carried.

ME: can't you fix this??
HUMAN: I don't think so.
ME: can't you ask Google or something?
HUMAN: good idea.

My human didn't have enough bars or whatever on Droid to get help from Google so she did the next best thing and called spotted Miley's mom. I couldn't hear what she was saying but my human's half went something like:

HUMAN: I don't have anything to flush it out with.
MILEY'S MOM: (stuff I couldn't hear)
HUMAN: no, they drink out of the cow troughs.
MILEY'S MOM: (stuff I couldn't hear) 
HUMAN: uhhhh, I guess I could use spit?

And that's when my human held me down and tried to spit up my snout. That's right. Her spit. My snout. I swear she was trying to kill me.

HUMAN: hold still!
ME: WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?!
HUMAN: we need to lubricate your nose.
ME: (sneeze sneeze sneeze)

I was sneezing too bad to argue but I was *not* happy about any of this. If I was the kind of dog that bites people in the face, it would have been the perfect time to bite her face off. I might not be a biter, but I do eat poo. And to spit up my snout, your lips need to be reeeeallly close to my mouth.

Remember this picture from the other day?

yummy cowpie!
It was taken a few minutes before my human spit up my snout. I guess I can't be too mad at her for doing it because whatever was stuck in me came out. But if she pulls anything like that again, I'm going to make sure my face is covered in fresh cowpie first.

26 comments:

Barbara said...

Pug, you get into the oddest predicaments! And you got spit in your snout? This is all too weird - I think my head is going to explode.

Buddy said...

ohmygoodness!!! Your human loves you more than you realize Pug. I had a HUGE piece of grass stuck up my snout one time. I know about the crazy sneezing. Like blood splatter sneezing. My human took me to the vet and they put non-spit up my snout and about a half hour later, my human pulled the HUGE piece of grass O-U-T!!

Angie K. said...

Oh My! You poor puggy! So not fair and I glad you are better now!

Meredith LeBlanc said...

If she says she has to pee on you to fix something Puglet, RUN!!!!!!

♥♥♥
Meredith & Scarlet

Mercy's Mom said...

Miley's Mom to the rescue again! Thanks!!

Vinny said...

Dude,
That's pretty weird what your human did to you, in fact it might be bordering on an HBOism - but she did save your life so I guess you can pretend it never happened. Maybe you should wear a bee hat on your adventures...maybe Dutch should too...maybe your human should too...maybe you can get a group discount...

Pug Power,
Vinny

Mercy said...

No Dutch Day this week???:(

Kisses, Kisses,
Mercy

Maggie and Lucy the Pugs in Dallas said...

OH MAN! That was some story Pug. I hope I or my sister Lucy never go thru something like that. That was horrible. Glad it all turned out ok and your human didn't kill you and oh, cowpie face was funny!

Sammy and Neko said...

So... miss A kissed a cowpie???
eeeeewwwwwww

lol

Sammy

Anonymous said...

OMG, Pug! You CRACK ME UP!! Fresh cowpies indeed.

Glad your Human got the fly out, even if it was unpleasant.

I think that bacon would be an appropriate apology for spitting in your snout, even if it was to help you not suffer and get the fly out.

- Mooch and Aussie (and Mooch's dad's thumbs)

Noodles said...

Puglet I am totally laughing my curly tail off!
On the other hand - fly up your nose? EEEEEK!
Love Noodles

Anonymous said...

OMG that must have been so scary for both of you! Glad you are okay now.

I never had anything stuck up my nose, but when my human sister was very little, she decided to put corn up her nose (why I'll never know) and she cried & cried until mom held her head still & dad used tweezers to pull out all the corn! Humans can be so weird.

Frodo, Molly & Cleo

Taryn said...

"And that's when my human held me down and tried to spit up my snout."...That may well be the funniest line ever on this blog!

Puglet, I am sorry you had a bug up your snout, but you gotta admit, your mom really loves you lots to put her mouth near your cow-pie mouth!

Anonymous said...

Puglet, Dude, so sorry about the snout misadventure. I felt really bad for you...and then I started laughing. Just the dark side of mirth - what can I say. I'm glad it wasn't a foxtail and that you're okay and all; still it was an hilarious tale.
Your Friend (Really),
Chubby T. Pug

Becky Vandenberg said...

Well Pug, if you're anything like me, you SPRAY snot all over the place when you sneeze. (I do it all the time to my human, especially on her feet) LOL :) Sooo....if she was spitting up your snout, then you were probably spewing all over her FACE LOL. Way to go. ♥ya, Ginger Pug

Anonymous said...

Oh my heavenly pugness!!! My sides hurt from reading this entry! What a brave and loving Mom you have for getting close to poo breath to help you while you projectile sneeze her own spit back at her! Oh the mental picture! I'll giggle about this all weekend. Thanks Puglet.
Megan with Madgie, Emmett, Rosie, Jake, & Dalia

Harry the pug from Oz said...

OMG just terrible! U sure have interesting adventures! Please b careful. Hooman was prob very scared for u, love licks

Anonymous said...

I just laughed so hard at your desciption of events finished by the cow pie mug! Sorry it happened to you sweet pug but hopefully you can laugh about it now
That is the way most things in life should be!
Love, love, love you guys.

Anonymous said...

Oh Puglet, thank God you are OK. That is just terrible having a fly up your snout! We say, whatever it takes, just get the fly the heck out of there! If it's spit, then it's spit, your human is helping get the fly out!!!
Love,
Pearl, Mac, Trixie and our human Sherry

euthymic said...

Mama meant well when she spit in your nose...at least it worked!

Mocha Barney, Ashley Pumpernickel and Winniechurchill

Oakley and Swisher said...

We've never had anything stuck in our snout. That sounds painful. But glad it came out, whatever it was.

Lots of licks,
Swisher and Oakley

King Edward the Pug said...

Puglet you have a great human!!
King Edward the Pug

Those Jersey Shore Puggles said...

Someday you'll look back on this adventure and you'll sneeze. LOL!

Roxi, Riley & Lea

Toet and Jessica said...

even if the method was weird, I'm happy your nose is happy again!

and, something unrelated except it's about weight issues and a big bonus for slimming down, do you know this blog?

http://blog.rollingdogranch.org/rolling_dog_ranch_animal_/2013/05/almost-there.html

StaceyH said...

!!!LMFAO!!!

Anonymous said...

Because of your post, puglet, and a google search, my mom spit in my nose today. 3 TIMES. Thanks alot!!! ps I am fine now. my mom is unclear as to whether the thing that was in my nose is out of my nose or whether I am simply trying not to sneeze to get my mom to stop spitting on me.
-Sincerely, Roo the Chihuahua