ERNIE

So yesterday my human says to me hey Pug, want to do something exciting?? And of course I say yes because 1) I'm freaking bored 2) exciting could be code for bacon and 3) Dutch wasn't invited.

ME: are we going to a drive thru?

HUMAN: you'll see.

ME: cupcakes?

HUMAN: you'll see!

ME: will there be food of ANY kind??

HUMAN: (silence)

I kinda got a little worried when my human stopped answering my questions. I mean, what if silence was code for trip to the vet? Uhm, no. It turns out 'exciting' and silence was code for this:

His name is Ernie and he lives next door. My friend Lulu's mom is his dog walker and she invited me over for a "play date" because Ernie is too young to have real friends or something. No idea. But obviously my human's definition of 'exciting' is waaaay different than mine.

Not that Ernie's a bad guy or anything, but he's a puppy. And the thing about puppies is humans go completely nuts over them and forget all about me. 

Ernie + my human's lap = not excited

Aww, he's SO cute. Aww, look at those feet! Aww, puppy breath!! Uhm, hello. I have feet and breath too. But with Ernie it's like I'm not even there. I mean, the dude fell asleep with his paw on his junk and I swear every human within a 5 mile radius was squeeeeing and awwwwing about it.

seriously?

So yeah. No bacon. No drive thru. No cupcakes. Just my new, ridiculously cute neighbor Ernie. Who my human said I better make friends with now because in a few months he'll be big enough to squash me like a bug.

Awesome.