IN MY DEFENSE

Hi everybody, Dutch here. You know I don't usually have much to say, but after what Pug wrote about our "sleeping arrangements", I feel like I need to defend myself.

First, let me make one thing clear: I love the little guy, I do. Pug is the best little brother on Earth. But he can be a bit of a... tyrant? And so Pug won't have to run off to ask Google, the word tyrant derives from the Latin tyrannus, meaning "illegitimate ruler". In classical politics, a tyrant is someone who has taken power by his or her own means as opposed to hereditary or constitutional power.

I was here first. I am bigger, stronger and smart enough to know the Latin origins of a word without running to Google. But who's in charge around here? Puglet.

And usually, this is fine with me. Pug can have the good spot on the couch. He can hog the camera and the internet all he wants. He can even play with my toys (except maybe my Henrietta rubber chicken). But when he starts talking smack and calling me a spotted-bed-hog? That's when I have to put my paw down and remind the little shrimp that *I* was here first and could squash him like a bug if I really wanted to.

Not that I ever would. But I could.

So, while it may be true that I take up slightly more bed than Pug, it is only because I am not shaped like a loaf of bread. When you have long legs, and an actual neck, snout and a tail, they have to go somewhere.