So, we're pretty healthy here at my house. My human's idea of a "special treat" is a carrot. Not that carrots are bad. I like carrots. Me and brother Dutch each get a great big fat one everyday. But a pug can't live on carrots alone, right?
OK, to be 100% honest, we get other stuff too. Once a week we get a bully penis or a great big marrow bone. And every now and then - usually when my human wants us to leave her alone - we get something really... special. And by special, I mean junkfood.
Well, last night my human must have needed some alone time because she made a beeline for our junkfood stash and fished out the last bit of junk: a package of Busy Chewnolas. But instead of giving us tasty Chewnolas to snack on, she just stood there, reading the package.
ME: Uhm, what are you doing?
MY HUMAN: Checking the ingredients for propylene glycol.
MY HUMAN: It makes your snacks chewy. There was just a thing on TV about it being a common ingredient in dog treats - even though it can kill your liver or something.
ME: Oh. Can I have that Chewnola now?
And you know what she said? No. And not because of the liver-killing glycol stuff. Chewnolas have none of that in them. But they do have something called "animal digest" and that TOTALLY freaked my human out.
Because "animal digest" is just a fancy way of saying poop.
Poop! In my Chewnola? Uhm, Ok. I can live with that. But clearly my human couldn't because she threw the perfectly good Chewnolas in the garbage! Yeah.
So you know what I did when she wasn't looking? Of course you do. I fished a Chewnola out of the garbage, hid under a pillow, and tried to eat as much as I could before getting caught. I didn't get very far because Dutch totally narc'd on me, but I don't think the part I ate had any poop in it.