So, you know how last week I kinda accused brother Dutch of being a giant spotted bed hog? Well, new facts have come to light. And now my human says I have to apologize.
Here's what happened, y'know, the new facts. The big, puffy blanket thing that's usually on the bed was at the cleaners. So my human used a whole bunch of regular blankets to keep us warm. Except one of the blankets wasn't regular - it was a special electric one. When you plug it in, it gets warm. And sleeping on it is like sleeping next to a friend. Even though it's just a blanket.
Well, the electric blanket just happened to land on Dutch's side of the bed. It wasn't very cold out, but my human plugged it in and turned it on. Just because she could. And you know what happened? Dutch didn't move an inch all night. He stayed on the electric blanket, on his side of the bed, the whole entire time.
My human repeated the electric blanket experiment, just in case it was some freak coincidence. And night after night, Dutch slept on the blanket. He didn't smush me like some kinda pug sandwich and my human didn't wake up all sore from being squashed into a pretzel.
Dutch isn't a bed hog after all. He was just... cold. And you can't really get mad at a guy for trying to keep warm, right? Even if they do accuse you of being shaped like a loaf of bread.
So, I apologized. And here I am apologizing again, in public, for the whole internet to read. Mostly because my human said I have to. But also because the electric blanket trick might help some other bed hogs be less... hoggy.
PS: Dutch thinks this apology stuff is pretty funny - me having to admit I was wrong and everything. He can laugh all he wants. He might not be a giant spotted bed hog, but I'm still in charge.