Before moving on to PHASE TWO: interrogation scene, I thought it'd be a good idea to ask Google what the best way to interrogate is. Y'know, since I've never technically interrogated anyone before and my Cheeto-Face doesn't make my human melt the way it used to.
Most of Google's interrogation techniques are waaaay too complicated for a pug with no thumbs to pull off. Except for one: sleep deprivation. Having Frank around makes this technique very easy because his snoring and our midnight wrestling-sessions are already depriving my human of sleep. She won't suspect a thing!
The only thing about sleep deprivation is it takes time, so the interrogation scene won't be happening for a few more days. But I do have some seriously exciting news that you don't have to wait until later to hear. Ready? OK, here it is:
That's right. The big fat souvenir from my stay at the House of Meat has been hiked out and starved off of me. And according to the official Pet Smart weigh-in scale, I am now a very slim 24.6 lbs. Woo Hoo!
Since I'm so far below the magic 25lb mark, I thought my human would let me pick out a whole bunch of new treats. But I thought wrong. Even though I'm skinny and made all sorts of begging faces, I was only allowed to get one treat. And it had to be low-fat.
My human is totally going to regret this decision when it's time for the interrogation scene.