Tuesday, November 17, 2009

MY HUMAN, THE HUSSY

I think my human is cheating on me.

For the past few months I've caught the scents of other dogs lingering on her clothes. And I don't mean other dogs we know - like The Crazy Labrador Brothers or our spotted friends Boka & Miley. No. These are the smells of stranger dogs.


Yesterday she forgot to hang her new leather coat in the closet so I had a chance to do some serious sniffing around. Leather holds scents much better than the stuff shirts and pants are made of and I got a really good whiff of who she's been hanging out with:

Labrador, male, approx 14 yrs old
Pug (!), male, not me, less than a year old
Bulldog, female, 2 years old
Great Dane, male, 5 years old
Unidentified puppy, female

Can you believe that?? My human is a complete hussy! I also found traces of fur and slobber and Cheeto crumbs that did NOT come from my mouth. I told brother Dutch my suspicions, but he didn't think it was such a big deal. We see her pet other dogs at the park all the time, he said.

Wearing her new leather coat?? I don't think so. She doesn't wear that kinda thing when we go to the park. At least not when she goes to the park with us. I don't care what Dutch says, something is going on.


I just don't know what.

14 comments:

Mr. Puggle said...

hahahha. poor puglet.

Fulmer the Pug said...

BOL!!! My Mom comes home smelling of new stinks everyday but I found out that it's the children she works with at school.

Meg n Lola in Las Vegas said...

Fulmer- My Mommy smells like kid stink, too! I love to sniff her in the afternoon! Puglet- Maybe if you start acting up, your Human won't feel right about leaving you alone... Pug Hugs, Las Vegas Lola

Rosie the Party Pug said...

Puglet...its hard to share your human but remember, there are lots of animals out there with no humans of their own. Maybe she is being a good human to a humanless dog. Just a thought ;-)

Arlo the Pug said...

Puglet! Hi, I'm arlo! Your blog cracks me up! I love it! Please accept this award from me and let's be friends!

Sequoia & Petunia said...

Oh no...where is your Hooman going? We knows she loves you. Maybe she is helping some pups in need?

Lola said...

You MUST get to the bottom of this, Puglet! These humans with their petting, oohing and aahing of other people's pets. What if they run out of pets for us? This behavior must be stopped!

THE PUGLET said...

I dunno WHAT she's been up to and I'm almost afraid to ask. I was kinda OK with it... until I smelled that other pug. He smelled A LOT like me!

Maybe I'm not cute enough anymore? What if she's going to recycle me????

pugsmom said...

Puglet,
I think I know how you wormed your way into your human's heart. I did that with my human mom. I know that she would never recycle me and I'm really certain that your human would NEVER recycle you. Rest your sweet heart about that.
Mine and Kizzy's brother, Harley the Keeshond went to sleep yesterday and we miss him so much. He told us he came to our house before we did as a recycled Keeshond. Our mom never, ever would have let him be recycled again. We know that we are here forever, that's why Kizzy is named Kizzy. (means Stay Put)
Pugs hugs to you and Dutch from us,
Phoebe

3pugs2luv said...

Oh, poor Puglet! Don't worry. Trust Dutch that there is nothing to be upset about. Your human loves both you & Dutch very much. However I do understand the jealousy. I would never let my human near another dog in front of me (I have caught her sneaking little rubs here & there behind my back!!), it's bad enough I have to share her with my daughter, Phoebe & her mom, Zoey. If it is any consolation; Phoebe's nuts & constantly driving my human crazy. Despite countless threats to do so, I have never found her up for bids on eBay. You have nothing to fear. I have found that if you work it right; guilt goes a very long way. You may be able to get some fun things & extra attention (you can never have too much)out of this. Keep your tail waggin.
Your Friend, Yoda

Stella and Gunther said...

Eee Gads Puglet! The possibilities are endless. But, before we let our imaginations run away with us, let's try to be rational. You and Dutch are the Cheetos of your mom's eye, thus making you irreplaceable.

Sometimes our humans go to a big building filled with cats and dogs who don't have their own humans. They visit each one and give them a little attention so they don't feel lonely. Kinda like when when our humans are looking for a mate and do that thing called speed dating. It's nothing to get worked up over.

Just to be on the safe side though, Stella suggests you do as she does. Whenever she smells anything strange or when we get a brand new bed, she takes a squat and pees on it. And proudly I might add. Your pee on mom's leather jacket will surely let everyone know she belongs to you and Dutch.

Glad I could help!

Your pal, Gunther

THE PUGLET said...

Gunther, DUDE!

If I pee on my human's jacket she'll TOTALLY recycle me!!!

I guess you're right about us being Cheetos though. I know my human really does love us. Thanks for reminding me of that. Smelling all those other dogs (especially that pug!) made me forget a little.

THE PUGLET said...

I like your thinking Yoda... maybe I can get some extra snacks out of this. That might make me feel a little bit better about the cheating.

THE PUGLET said...

Phoebe,

I'm so leaky to hear about your Keeshond brother Harley :(

My human told me when dogs go to Sleep, it makes them feel better. They miss us like we miss them, but are still happy to be Sleeping.

I feel good when I take a nap. Maybe Sleeping is like a forever nap?