Monday, April 29, 2013


Hellloooo! I'm back. I, Dutch, that is. Don't worry, Pug will be back soon and will probably complain about me hijacking everything. But you know what? I don't care.

Do. Not. Care.

Sorry, but I just don't. Near death experiences can be life changing. You can ask Google. Of course I still love pink and all the Justins, but I am a changed dog. It is not an easy thing to explain, but life feels a little different than it did before. I feel different. You will see....

Before Pug takes back the blog, I need to tell you some things. First: the rest of our trip. In case you missed the beginning part, we went from New Jersey to a place called Baltimore to catch a plane that could go from one ocean to the other without stopping. The whole thing was very confusing. I didn't ask questions.

Baltimore has bridges.
I didn't see anything in Baltimore but the inside of a car, La Quinta and the airport but everyone I met there was exceptionally nice. I think they wanted to make sure I left the Other Coast with a good last impression. Except for the angry cat in front of us in the security thing who tried to rip my face off, I felt nothing but love from Baltimore.

Baltimore, I love you too!

The Southwest airplane people were even nicer than Baltimore but I didn't like the plane ride so much because our human stuffed a handful of pills down my face to make me sleep through the plane ride. She said it was the vet's idea, but hello! Who wants to sleep through their last plane ride ever?

Not me.

Trying to be awake with a body full of sleepy pills isn't easy or fun or nice or good in any way. By the time we got back to our coast I was toast. Walking through that LAX place with a body full of sleepy pills was NOT fun or nice or good in any way either. Scary.

The Dreaded 405.
From LAX we went to some thing called The Dreaded 405. I heard my human say she still has nightmares about it from when she lived in Southern California so I was a more than a little worried. But it wasn't scary at all. We mostly just sat in the car and didn't move. At all. For a very long time.

The 405 was so extremely boring I decided to let the sleepy pills do their thing. I don't know how many hours later I woke up to the smell of this:

Yes, that is what you think it is. At first I thought I was dreaming. I've never been to a Drive-Thru but I know that's where Baconators come from. I'd been eating nothing but chicken and rice for weeks. Was I really about to be rewarded with a Baconator? A whole entire Baconator of my very own?

No. I was not. Inside that yummy smelling bag was a grilled chicken sandwiches (hold the mayo). My human had a bag of rice in her suitcase so I didn't even get to eat the bun. I was a little disappointed to learn you can get all sorts of things at a Drive-Thru, but please don't tell Pug. He doesn't have to know.

It took a long time to get from LAX to our house. My human didn't have enough brain left to understand the signs outside Frank's house so Pug stayed another night. I was happy to be home and have her all to myself for a little while more. We fell asleep on the couch (for a very long time) and I didn't have to share the ottoman with anybody.

Now, I must run. I have one last vet appointment with the fabulous Dr. Fong. I can't wait to show him my new belly zipper! I'll be back tomorrow with the other things I want to tell you. If Pug is nice, perhaps I'll let him say hello.




Beatrix's Mom said...

Hi Dutch!

So glad you're home! Even better that you had a chance to experience drive-thru. I've gone through once. Apparently it's a never to be repeated experience, since my mom still has nightmares about it (one word: BACON). ::pug shrug::

We've missed you! And Pug. Can't wait to have the family together again!


Anonymous said...

Yeah!!! Couldn't be happier! Love, Megan F. & Lola Pug

Sammy and Neko said...

Love !! That's it. Welcome home.

Noodles said...

Hi Dutch,
Loving that you are back here and healthy. I hope your human is resting up big time, too. She needs that. I miss Puglet but I haven't minded you dominating the blog, either. I slept better knowing you were alright.
Love Noodles

Bruno and Diesel's mom said...

Dutchie-boy! So good to hear from you & see your precious face =) I can't tell you how relieved I am that you're home safe & sound. Tell your human those signs made my head hurt. I can't begin to figure them out! Sorry you went to the magic drive-thru & still ended up with chicken & rice; very clever of your hu-mom! Say hello to Puglet; I'm starting to miss him.
Love always, Bruno & Diesel's mom ♥♥♥

Paula from DE said...

Dutch, I am so glad you and your human made it home safe and you are feeling better. Sorry you didn't get the baconator, but I think when you are back to 100% you definitely deserve a " non - sharing " one of your own.
Lots of love Pink Man!

Paula from DE said...

Dutch, I am so glad you and your human made it home safe and you are feeling better. Sorry you didn't get the baconator, but I think when you are back to 100% you definitely deserve a " non - sharing " one of your own.
Lots of love Pink Man!

JessieJane said...

So good to hear from you Dutch, Amanda and Puglet.

Daisy Dog

Buford T. Justice said...


Glad you had an uneventful trip home.....Sleep is always good when in a car....Bambi always sleeps when she is travelling to her Agile Dog things but she says she has to rest up for all that running.....


Buford T. Justice and The Pack O' Pugs and a Boston, and soon to be a Petite Brabancon

Anonymous said...

Oh, Dutchie, we are so happy that you are home safe. Our Mom is actually leaking, but she does that a lot these days. No idea.

Love, Roscoe and Champ

Mercy said...

I'm happy you are home with your human and Pug. The happy pills were probably a good idea; never pass up free drugs.

Real bummer about the drive through. I go to the drive through thingy a lot, the one Wendy works at. Juan, Jose, Carmalita & Wendy LOVE ME. They always give me free fries and on days they're mad at their boss they give me the big size fries. Maybe you should talk to Wendy. Want me to try to get her phone number for you?

Hope you check in with us tomorrow.
Kisses, kisses,

Pug Slope said...

What a crazy experience, Dutch! I'm so glad to hear you are back home and able to relax with all your pink stuff. I bet Puglet is happy to see you, too, although I wouldn't mention you got to go to a drive-thru without him.

Rest up, buddy - and make sure your momma rests up, too!


Anonymous said...

Yeah, glad you are doing so well Dutch!

Meredith LeBlanc said...

Oh, we're so glad you got back home safely Dutch! We must say, we miss Pug too, so we can't wait to hear more :)

Meredith & Scarlet

CeilMary said...

So glad you are home and ok. Sorry that you missed the drive thru bacon. Hey, my mom is a vegetarian who doesn't drive...I'll never get bacon. She cooks us chicken and hamburger with brown rice and some vitamin stuff. Say hey to Puglet. Your friend, Guy Noir

Those Jersey Shore Puggles said...

Dutch !! So glad you're at home now and all is right with the world again. What a crazy, scary trip. Wonder what Pug will have to say about your belly zipper .... Love You!

Roxi, Riley & Lea

Max and Lola, the north Toronto pugs said...

Hi Dutch!

We're really glad that your near-death experience has turned out to be a coming of age experience. You're a grown up, assertive dog now, and need no longer play second fiddle to Puglet, charming as he is.

Love and kisses

Bunk said...

Good to know you're back and well!

We do miss the puglet and can't wait for her presence to be back. I hope you enjoyed your drive-through experience tons!:)

We have been busy for the past week putting up our new blog layout so we have not been able to comment! Come by and check it out when you have the chance!


Bunk The Pug.

badger law said...

I like this new Dogmatic Dutch. Glad to see your feeling better and that you still love pink

Badgerlaw and Tigger the cat

Maggie and Lucy the Pugs in Dallas said...

Oh man...what an adventure you told us! Oh so happy you are home! I know Pug has missed you and you'e missed him too...the whole family can be together again. We are excited here in Big D!

Butch and Sundance said...

Life is GRRRRRRRRRRRRRREAT when we get a post from the Daily Puglet! we are happy to hear that Dutch is doing great. We miss Puglet though :(

Anonymous said...

HOORAY HOORAY, you're home safely, AND posting!

Pearl, Mac, Trixie and our mom Sherry