Monday, June 2, 2014

DUTCH MONDAY: gluten vs. foxtail

Happy Monday! Sorry I missed you on our usual day, but I was still a little traumatized by my brush with the devil. More on that in a minute.

Since I was here last time, two things have happened. One thing was nice, one was not. The nice thing was a bath. It was warm, full of bubbles and ended with a cookie and a pink towel. I had to share the tub with Pug, but it was still soooo relaxing! 

The other thing was not relaxing. It looked like this:

I'm sorry for being gross! I'm only telling you this grossness so it doesn't happen to you. It's what happens when you eat a foxtail and it gets stuck on the way down. 

If you don't know what a foxtail is, it's an evil plant that wants to kill you. I don't know why foxtails are such haters, but they are NOT nice. On the outside they look like any other planty thing. But on the inside they are the devil:

Getting a devil plant stuck in your throat is NOT a good time. It was hard to breathe and I puked up my breakfast. Walking with the devil is hard because walking makes you breathe more and breathing with the devil in your throat hurts. 

Lucky for me, a nice ranger lady drove us back to Mazda so I didn't have to walk very far. I assumed our next stop would be the vet's, but on the way there we took a strange detour. To the House of Bagels.

I know. I thought the same thing. Especially since my human isn't allowed to eat gluten anymore and that's all a bagel is. At first I thought maybe she just had to pee because that happens a lot, but then she came out with a bag. It was all very confusing.

HUMAN: bagel time!
ME: but I thought gluten was evil?
PUG: dude, icksnay on the evilnay!
HUMAN: it is, but sometimes you have to fight evil with evil.
PUG: no idea what that means, but do I get to eat evil too?

What happened next was practically a miracle. After three bites of bagel, the devil plant was out of my throat. Gone. I could breathe and drink and eat more bagel without anything hurting. Best of all, no trip to the vet!

My human says we were just lucky and bagels aren't a miracle cure for anything, but she's just grumpy. I know the truth. Now you do too.

Love & Bagels,



mlb7791 said...

Oh my Gosh Dutch that is awful! I don't even want to look at that evil think much less get it stuck in my throat! You poor thing! I am so glad you are better! Thank You Bagel!
I love you Dutch! And of course Pug Too!

Anonymous said...

A very happy ending to a scary tail tale!

Anonymous said...

Did pug get to eat some? Your human is smart. Gotta love her.

Sammy and Neko

Mercy said...

Dear Dutch,
Ouch! Those Foxtails things are scarey! My cousin, Brandy, who lives in Millbrae talks about those things too. She says they're the devil too. I'll tell her about the bagels. Your human is smart but probably she should have bagels in Mazda ALL THE TIME, in case of emergency. Love your bath picture with your pink towel. You deserved a spa day after the Foxtail thing!
Kisses, Kisses,

Paco the Pug said...

Yikes! Dutch! That planty thing Does look nasty! Very glad you didn't have to suffer with that thing in your throat too long... Good thing bagels came to the rescue! Even Pug scored some yummy bagel. Kind of a nasty event after your lovely bath, but I'm so glad you are well. And Pug too!
To yummy eatables!
Jackie & Paco

Amy in Colorado said...

I'm so glad the bagel trick worked, Dutchie. Roscoe had one of the evil foxtails stuck in his ear one time and he had to go to the vet to get it taken out. I don't think a bagel would have worked in his ear. Have a pink week!

Anonymous said...

Geez we wish we could eat bagles but our mom says they would pack on the pounds. Sucks to be a pug sometimes.
Emmitt, Ellie & Eli your friends in San Antonio

Minnie and Max Pugs said...

Glad all turned out well.

Charlie the Pugster said...

Dutch, so glad you didn't have to go to the vet! I have never had one of the devil things--- thanks goodness! Sooo glad you are okay!

Eddie the Pug and his Mom said...

So glad you are okay handsome boy!
Luvvies from,
Eddie the Pug

Maggie and Lucy the Pugs in Dallas said...

All we have to say is...thank you bagels!!!!

Maggie and Lucy the Pugs in Dallas said...

All we have to say is...thank you bagels!!!!